She’s right but there’s a lacuna. Unless you’ve lived and worked abroad, there’s no way to explain it to desperate Nigerians. You’d think you’re going to heaven as a first time traveller. However, staying married is the koko. The pressure is massive for most unlucky people without safety net. Genzies are saving lives by talking and showing what lives look like abroad. They don’t sugarcoat anything. Yes, the grass is always greener at your neighbour’s but all the things you took for granted in Naija would become the biggest deals abroad. Let’s start with your favourite Nigerian foods. They’re outrageously expensive if you can get to buy them. Those in the UK especially London are luckier than most coz it’s closer to Naija than those in North America, Eastern Europe, Asia and Australia. The farther you are from the fatherland the more expensive they become. Secondly, the culture shock is brutal. Oyinbo never mean well for people with the black skin. They still believe we are monkeys and sometimes, we reinforce this stereotype by the way we behave in public spaces; loud on phone, cutting corners, lying about almost everything and very hypocritical. Only Neanderthals would feel very proud trash talking his own country. You won’t get brownie points talking shit about Naija in front of your hosts. Americans and Europeans put their countries first coz they understand the most important point: leaders will come and go but your nation will remain forever. Those who love fucking would quickly realize that Oyinboland emphasizes working very hard than praying for weather for two. No free lunch. Without a job, you’re in the danger zone of suicidal thoughts and homelessness. And forget friends; they’re probably worse off. You’re literally on your own. So, before you rush any woman offering you the chance to Japa, think well if you’re the type who behaves like a king in your house; ordering people around and waking people up in the middle of the night to prepare egusi soup and hot fufu for you. Same goes for women who live on profitable runs. Zero attention from men and no billing of any man would drive you crazy. Infact, your available lover is that dildo you bought online. For married men, that Nigerian woman who used to be very submissive back home would shock you. All your bloated ego would be quickly deflated. Many people find it difficult to believe that, tens of thousands of Japa people would grab the chance to Japada if there’d be jobs and shelter waiting for them. The worst part is the fear of returning and getting mocked by friends and family especially when you come back with nothing. Those who used to mock Abroadians who warned you not to come are also abroad today and desperately looking for ways to return too. Like deja vu, they’re also warning new sets of Japa adventurers not to venture. When you Japa, you’re starting life all over and may be quite upsetting if your expectations are diametrically opposite of the realities in your new abode. Japa is exactly like leaving home for the first time and getting boarded in private school. You’d feel alone and teary. Sometimes, settling takes time to materialize. Japa isn’t what you think. The 247 light would be less thrilling when you struggle to make ends meet. Meanwhile, loads of people are depending on you in Naija. Oyinboland is the land of endless bills and many people are still in the rat race after 20 years of nothingness. Overall, some people will make it outside the shores of Naija while many others would regret leaving their comfort zones for Oyinboland. Everything’s up to you.
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