A Nigerian nurse in the diaspora, Nancy Umeh, has appealed to married men to ensure their wives are not stagnant in life and that they make as much progress as they the men are making in life.
In a video that has gone viral, Nancy recollected how a male social media user left nasty comments on her posts about her husband who is hands-on and helps with their kids, She said the social media use described her husband as her ‘’houseboy” just for being hands-on. She said she was startled by the comments and more startled to see women liking his distasteful comment.
Addressing such men with such mindsets, Nancy in her video said
‘’Your wife has paid the ultimate sacrifice to continue your legacy and was almost un-alive bringing them to this world. Listen! If you do not do anything in this world as a married man, I need you to ensure that your wife is not stagnant. Make sure your wife is progressing the same way you are progressing.
You know why that is important? Self actualization is actually a very strong indicator of how mentally stable your wife will be and that stability is transferred to your children”
She went on to say that in real terms, her husband earns five times more than she does but that he ensures she progresses well in life so that she can make her own contribution to the upkeep of their home. Explaining why her husband is particular about her growth, she said
‘’When we were starting our family, I paused. He was progressing but the moment our kids started school, he was like come babe, lets think. What do you want to do? Let is do this. Your wife has done the hardwork of bringing your children in, she has breastfed them. The moment they are in school, I need you to sit your wife down, plot a pathway for her own advancement. You cannot be the only one advancing in your family. That is why a lot of women resent their husband. After 20, 30 years she looks back and is like ‘wow, my time was used for the family’.”
Speaking further, Nancy said men need to stop that they are helping their wives by taking care of their kids.
‘’You are not a houseboy because you are caring for your own legacy. A lot you don’t even know where salt is in your house. You can’t bath your children. To reheat food someone else made, you cannot. Somebody’s time is running that for your family. Your family is advancing because somebody’s time is on the line. I need you to sacrifice your own time. I need you to sacrifice your own time now. I need you to say my own job is not just to be providing. I need you to be present in your children’s life.”
Watch a video of her speaking below
